Physical Attraction

It is a given that men tend to be attracted to those that they consider to be physically attractive to them. And they usually and at a sub-conscious level find qualities in women like honesty, kindness and intelligence as being attractive. Allowing these qualities to flourish in you as a woman would make you to be more attractive than other women.

So you have to be properly groomed and dressed for your own type of body. Doing this will make sure that at all times you are looking as best as you possibly can and this would definitely put you in a good light. And if you dress to compliment your body type the so called negative elements would be played down.

Similarities

People tend to become closer if they have common things that draws them together. Common traits creates affinity and there is a likelihood that a guy would connect to you at a deeper level if they get to find out something in you that is like them. These may be views, hobbies or food and background. And in a relationship, once common targets are set couples tend to bond closer as it gives the feel that they are holding hands to have that achieved.

As a girl, it won’t dim your cause if you find out one or two things about the guy you want to notice you. And once you find out something both of you have in common, what is left is for you to accentuate it and make it noticeable.

- Compliments

Complimenting a guy is one of the surest ways of getting noticed. The trick is not to come out as being too heavy and timing is also very important. Any form of compliment would definitely get you noticed but since the objective is to get he guy into a steady relationship that is meaningful, it is important that you do not come off looking to heavy as it would make you look cheap. You don’t have to say something complimentary to pay such compliments. Just listening and agreeing or supporting or finding something valid that he has just said could do the trick.

Contact & Cooperation

The more contact you have with the guy the more comfortable he would become with you. This would in turn make you more noticeable and worth looking into.

Conditioning & Association

The typical man has been conditioned to be attracted or look at that which is more beautiful. So when you want to get a guy to like you, it won’t just do if you do not tend to stand out.

Applying theses tips will help you along the way in getting that guy of your dreams.

Happiness and satisfaction come from knowing that someone cares for you and have your best interests at heart. However, if this is not nurtured, it can fade away and become just a normal feeling. Yet, it would not mean that the person does not love you again. They would still be in love with you but the magic is what shall have faded away.

Why does the magic die? Well, with time, people tend to bury themselves in other prospects like search of excellence and success in as far as their relationships is concerned and they would sacrifice their relationship interests along the way. Age brings about more responsibility and imparts pressure on an individual so they will not have time for relationship.

The first step to keeping your relationship glowing is to realize that it is not easy to find your perfect match. If you already found your match, then you should be able to safeguard it. Endeavor not to let go your perfect match. One way you would keep your relationship aglow despite the pressures of life is to ensure that you always reassure them of your love. When you keep your loved one reassured, they will always love you back.

The second step is about doing thoughtful things that keep your love glowing. It would help if you can reflect some of the things you did together when you fell in love in those early days and this would include sharing surprise gifts like flowers and dates. You should create time for such moments. Finally, you can also try to find time to be together like going for holidays as a couple. The time spent together just the two of you would reignite your relationship. If you have found love, please take these 3 steps to keep it alive and for those who are still looking, maybe dating sites can help you!

Samantha was almost 50 years old and she wasn’t in a steady relationship and did not have a child either. Needless to mention, she had the desire to have a family of her own. In her discussion with her doctor, the doctor had categorically mentioned to her that she had slim chances of conceiving even with fertility drugs. She was in denial of reality. She did not look her age, she appeared younger, and maybe because of the many plastic surgeries she had had. She easily got away with lying about her age. She even went further to get a fake driving license to prove her fake age. She also lied about her family that she came from a family that owned lucrative candy business which was all lies. She was drowning in credit card debt of over 40,000 USD.

Unfortunately for Samantha , she met Ryan another cheat. Ryan posed as an ambitious stock broker who was looking to start a family. The two quickly engrossed in romance and Ryan had to maintain his fake status. In just three weeks, he brought an expensive diamond necklace to Samantha. Another three weeks later he gave her a two carat diamond engagement right. After 8 weeks they were in Hawaii for romantic getaway where Samantha confessed her true age to Ryan . However, she still lied that she can conceive. After 2 weeks, she lied to Ryan that she had a miscarriage.

Turning point was 4 months later when she ran into Ryan on their patio wearing her make up and imagining a garden party on their patio. Six months later he is arrested in public for involvement is several jewelry store robberies and truth dawns on her. They begin working on a divorce. A friend and some two attorneys convince Samantha that she should return the jewelry to Ryan for her own interest.

The lesson here is that lies don’t help in relationships. Samantha only lied so she could get a younger husband for her own selfish gains like saving her form her debts. Ryan on the other had lied for selfish reasons too, so that he would marry a rich woman to hide his secret life. Had they been honest about their intentions, they wouldn’t have married each other in the first place. The result would be that they wouldn’t have spent on attorney for divorce and they wouldn’t have divorced marital status. Again, it is important to cultivate skills of introspect, foresight and keep values.

In the literal experience, the cheated person is viewed as victim and the cheating person is the perpetrator. The questions here tend to focus on why the perpetrator cheated and not why the victim was cheated on. The perpetrator would have two options. They would either regret or torture themselves mentally and emotionally about their actions or they would attempt to justify their action. They may feel that their needs were overlooked in the relationship or they were hitting back on a partner who has cheated on them before. But the justification is a mere defense mechanism. The victim on the other hand feels betrayed and empty, powerless and out of control.

Why people cheat

There are different reasons why men cheat and also different reasons why women cheat. Men feel they need to procreate with several women because of evolutionary reasons. Women on the other hand are emotional beings with no control. Evolution argues that men have no control over their actions and should not be held accountable. But both men and women are motivated emotional by their desire to fulfill their needs.

The needs can be higher or lower. Lower needs are less evolved and typically create conflict when the inner child carries trauma. They include being accepted, validated, nurtured, loved and approved. They control one’s life. They can make one lose their self and lead to playing stories out of the past. People can also cheat as a way of revenge where one projects their unprocessed part into their life. Women have both masculine and feminine traits in them. They have inner child in them that may make them act emotionally and irresponsibly.

The cheated person (victim) will obviously harbor feelings of rejection, abandonment, loss, betrayal, powerlessness, hopelessness and emotions such as anger, frustration and resentment because of trauma. If one was rejected and abandoned as a child, they are vulnerable to cheat. They will always fear being left like had happened in their childhood. This can lead to feelings of low self worth, neglect and self sabotage. They would then push the other person away because they associate their ego mind their past and live their past patterns presently.

Counter past feelings

To counter, one needs to fully process their past because it can influence one’s present life. This further impact on the people you attract and the quality of relationships you have. Relationships are powerful; they can make or break one’s individual identity. Unfinished and unprocessed past can affect one’s present. Avoid being trapped by your past experience. Protect your sense of self. Cheating leads to dysfunctional relationships that cause empty feelings and this beats the purpose of relationships. Never be enmeshed or dependent on your past experience.

For example, a girl’s self-worth is tied to her drug addict boyfriend loving her, and will do anything necessary to make him happy, even if it means giving him money she cannot afford to. She tries desperately to get him to stop doing drugs on her own, but cannot stand seeing him upset or in trouble so she gives him all her money, a place to live, and lies for him to protect him from losing his job, all because her happiness depends on him. He never changes, and she lives in misery because she can’t say no. So how can you change if your co-dependent?

1. Ask for help. By far the most important part of overcoming co-dependency is to have support. Without it, it is nearly impossible. Tell a close friend or family member about your problem, find out their opinion, and ask for their support. One of the hardest things for someone who is co-dependent is to say “no” and not give other people what they want, even if it hurts them. To do so will require the support of friends and family to reassure you that you did the right thing and are still loved and important.

2. Let other people take the consequences for their actions. Many co-dependent people, particularly parents, work hard to protect other people and make up for their mistakes. For example, the wife of an alcoholic will make excuses for her drunken husband to protect him from the consequences of his drinking. This does not help but rather allows the husband to keep drinking. Letting others face the consequences of their problems will help them realize that they cannot continue their behavior and is often the first step towards changing.

3. Set boundaries. Co-dependent people do what others want, no matter the price or harm to themselves. To change, they have to set boundaries for how far they will go. For example, a mother may need to tell her rebellious son that they will help him change, but if he gets in trouble they will not be there to bail him out of jail. This shows people that you will say “no” and that they cannot take advantage of you. Healthy boundaries are necessary to protect you from harm and pain caused by other people.

4. Thoroughly examine yourself to see where you have become co-dependent. If you do not know in what ways and in which relationships you are co-dependent, it is impossible to change the behavior. Take a thorough, honest appraisal of yourself, and if necessary ask for help from other people, and find out what exactly needs to change.

1. The most important part of a healthy relationship is communication. That’s why it’s so important to talk to your partner and listen intently to what they have to say. You will be surprised how big a difference that improving communication with your partner can have for your relationship. All of the sudden you will feel a deeper, more intimate connection as you get to know each other all over again by telling each other your thoughts and feelings, and listening intently to what the other person has to say.

2. Focus on your partner’s unique little quirks and the strange things they do that make them who they are. It’s easy to forget about our partner’s weird little aspects or even get upset over them, but those things are what make them the person who you fell in love with. Celebrate the things that make them an individual and remember why you loved them in the first place. Embracing each other’s unique personality traits will bring you closer together and help you remember why you fell in love in the first place.

3. Try winning each other’s love all over again as if you first started dating. Bring back the romance by going out for dates at fancy, romantic restaurants or night time walks through a beautiful park. Do those special things you did to impress your partner and win their love in the beginning of the relationship, those things that made it a challenge. You will feel as though you’re relationship is young and fresh by bringing back the chase and making each other feel special again.

4. Appreciate your partner. Notice when they dress up nice or get a new haircut and tell them how much you like it. Give them a compliment on how well they do at work. All too often couples get complacent and used to each other and don’t notice when they’ve done something nice, or forget to tell them how much they appreciate the work they do. Sharing your appreciation for each other will make you feel special and important to your partner and rekindle some of that fire that was lost when you took each other for granted.

5. Finally, be intimate and make love more often. This may seem obvious, but too many couples forget how important and foundational it can be for a relationship. Having more sex can really bring a couple together by bring back the intimacy, rebuilding the bond, and reinforcing the commitment in the relationship. Couples who are not intimate with each other lose the special bond that is the concrete in a relationship and slowly draw further and further apart. There is nothing more powerful than sex when trying to relight the fire in a relationship.

Using these steps will bring you and your partner closer together and help you build a deeper, closer, more committed relationship. Most importantly, the relationship will feel renewed and as fresh as it was in the beginning by reigniting the fire and passion that brought you together.

Obviously, this isn’t healthy. Bringing up the past never helps solve any present issue or the original issue in the first place. It just adds paid and frustration to an already tense situation. So why is it so common in relationships for a past even to be continually brought up in the future? It’s likely because it was never dealt with properly the first time.

Often, when hurtful situations arise, the problem that caused the situation is never dealt with. The two people are both far too emotionally charged to deal with a situation rationally and logically. The problem is never resolved and ends up being an ongoing issue in the relationship. It gets brought up in future fights because one or both of the people is still upset about it and hasn’t moved on.

The obvious solution is to move on, but that’s much easier said than done. It’s hard to just let go sometimes, and that’s why the past continues to be an issue into the future. If we could just let it go then there wouldn’t be a problem. Unfortunately, many couples never move on from the past and it ends up causing the two to break up. So how do you avoid letting the past end your relationship?

It’s really pretty simple, but for one reason or another never seems to happen; the best way is to be honest with your partner about it and that you want to talk about it rationally and resolve the issue. Tell them openly that the past event still bothers you and set aside a time where the two of you can sit down and have a rational, logical talk. It will never be resolved if it’s only talked about during fights, because both parties are too emotionally heated to find a rational solution.

Open, honest communication is the key to resolving any issue, and that includes trying to get over the past. Talk about what bothers you and try to find a solution to the problem. It’s also important to set ground rules such as no name calling, yelling, or blaming each other for the problem. This will ensure that the conversation stays productive and doesn’t get too emotional and turn into a fight. There is no way it will ever be resolved that way.

Be sure to not only share your feelings, but to listen closely and intently on your partner’s feelings and what they have to say as well. It might be nice to get rid of all of your baggage, but if your partner doesn’t let go as well the problem will continue to arise. Two way communication is essential to any relationship, so be sure to listen as well as speak.

If the issue continues to come up, try to find out why. Are you still upset, or are you just mad about something else and looking to pick a fight? That is often a reason for bringing up the past, but if not then you still haven’t moved on and should honestly tell your partner that. Openly communicating your feelings is the only way to get past the past, and will assure the long term health of the relationship.

It’s very telling to watch the difference in people’s behaviors when they’re either with or without their spouse. When it’s just the guys, a six pack of beer, and a football game, a man can be a completely different person than when he’s with his wife at the local block party. Women are no different; women would dare not repeat their conversations from girl’s night out in front of their husbands.

To some extent, this behavior is both normal and understandable; everybody needs a way to release and vent. But all too often husbands and wives go along this way for far too long, so consumed with work, the kids, and their lives that they end up growing so far apart that the marriage instead becomes more like a business partnership. Both parties prefer to go their separate ways then spend time with the one they swore to love forever.

Fortunately, for those who still want the deep, loving, and committed relationships that they once had there is an easy solution. Set aside 20 or 30 minutes every day to do nothing but talk with each other, and you’ll be surprised at how much more fulfilling the relationship becomes. Spend time talking about life: about work, your friends, food, or the movies. It really doesn’t matter. The point is that the couple spends time re-connecting and learning about each other and in no time the relationship will be deeper and more passionate than it has in a long time.

It’s important that during the set aside time no kids, cell phones, TVs, or computers are around. It needs to be just husband and wife focused solely on each other. All of the other stuff is what dragged the couple apart in the first place, now it’s time to concentrate on your soul-mate. It’s important to mix it up as well; talk over dinner one night, go for a walk the next, just make sure that it’s always fun and enjoyable so that neither party is tempted to start blowing the appointments off.

The renewed closeness won’t be a secret between the two of you either. At those parties where it was awkward to be together and each person spent more time talking with neighbors than standing next to each other, people will now see an amazing difference in how the couple interacts. They are happier, more connected, and the relationship has a new life to it that your friend’s relationships just don’t have.

It sounds simple enough, talking for a half hour a day, but it’s shocking how little couples actually talk and know about each other. All it takes is a half of an hour each day to talk to the person who is supposed to be the most important in your life, which doesn’t seem like too much to ask. Make the appointment the most important part of the day; let nothing get between you and your time together. You’ll be shocked how great your relationship can be.

• He gets annoyed with the little tasks in a relationship

When a man begins to get annoyed at even the smallest responsibility in the relationship, for example he gets annoyed that you called to talk to him about a problem in work, it usually means he needs a break. It’s not that he doesn’t want to talk to you, but he may feel like he doesn’t have the independence to live his own life because he’s too busy with the relationship.

• He shows more interest in other guys than in the relationship

If your man only wants to talk about the good times he had with the guys or is constantly telling you what his friends are up to, it’s pretty likely that he feels like the relationship is keeping him from seeing his friends. This is an obvious sign that he wants his space and needs some time away with his friends.

• He is always busy with something other than the relationship

Men will go out of their way to stay busy with work, hobbies, or activities that they know their women won’t interrupt if they feel like they are too consumed with the relationship. If your man can’t sit still and seems to be constantly too involved with other things to focus any effort on the relationship, chances are that he is using it as an excuse to get some time away.

• You feel like you’re spending all your time together

Even if you’re absolutely loving the fact that you get to spend all your time with your man, he most likely doesn’t and is yearning for some alone time. Spending every waking minute together may seem like a dream, but your man probably feels trapped and will eventually start pushing you away.

• He becomes combative over even the smallest things

Men will generally do everything they can to avoid fighting with their girlfriends, and aren’t typically concerned over the small things. If your man is suddenly combative and argumentative over things that wouldn’t usually bother him, it’s a pretty clear sign that he feels smothered and wants some space.

• His focus is elsewhere when you’re together

If your man seems to be off in la-la land while the two of you are together, he probably feels like you’re spending too much time together. Men typically want to avoid hurting their girlfriends, so instead of telling you he wants space he will suck it up and deal with his feelings by keeping his focus elsewhere.

Instead of living with a relationship where the man is combative, distant, or not interested in you, it’s better to just give him the freedom and space he desires. The relationship will be better off in the long run for it.

i. Remain natural

It is likely that your wife loves you for being the natural man she met. The secret with being natural is that she will always find you to be fun being around and romantic and this will ignite and hold your relationship. You should struggle to remain as natural even as days go by.

ii. Be a good listener

Listening is a key skill for those who wish to remain romantic and in charge of their marriage. Your woman will tell you are in charge when you can handle and solve problems. In marriage, problems are bound to arise and unless you are a good listener, you may not note problems and tackle them well. You can only support your wife when you are attentive as they express their emotions.

iii. Be a good communicator

Besides listening to your partner, you also need to communicate well with them. You do not need to be creative or have so many stories to tell but simple acts like finding out how the day of your wife went on is one way of showing concern and being their for them. On the other hand, you also need to open up to your wife in your communications for a stronger relationship.

iv. Maintain physical contact

As time goes by, you will realize that you get overwhelmed with responsibilities. However, a man who is romantic and in charge will ensure he creates time to hug, kiss or even just touch his wife. This will remind her of the days the relationship was blooming.

v. Maintain hygiene

It is likely that with time, a man would pay less attention to his grooming. However, it is important to maintain proper hygiene by trying to smell and look nice for your wife. This alone is romantic.

vi. Try new tricks

Finally, you should be keen to try new tricks so as to spice the relationship. You can change location of your getaway weekend, try different menu or different fun activities and this is exciting.

No doubt, the above will help you remain the man in your marriage and a romantic and passionate husband your wife married.